The 2nd of 2014!

I guess by me writing this on the 2nd day of the new year have something to do with my birthday which is the 2nd of February. I'm lost for words... I'm not even sure what words to say right now. But I'm going to try any way. I feel numb in a way that I'm just used to the pain the mistreatment, the bossing around, and not saying anything to anyone because not everyone will be able to understand what I'm trying to say. I don't know. I'm just by far over everything that is occurring around me. See I have this big beautiful picture in my mind of what I want to accomplish in the future despite what is going on around me. I keep telling myself that everything is going to be alright and that my life is not going to be like this forever. But the pain somehow interrupt and takes me away from concentrating on the bright side of my life. Sometimes I wish that I could go back to my childhood where I can lay my face on the soft skin of Cici Mary and just act like a baby around Miss. Unfortunately that's impossible because there Is no way I can reverse the clock and revisit those special moments. Often I catch myself sad just thinking about the good days especially on them cloudy days. But you know what they said at the end of every tunnels there's a light. I'm almost there... Because I can see a dim of light peeking through the walls. Glory be to God!