I've learn

I've learned through my personal experiences in life that you got to always pay attentions to people and their actions. When someone shows you their true color the 1st time you have to pay close attention and DONT ignore it. It's okay to help others but make sure that you are aware of who you're helping. Not everyone that advice you mean good towards you. You have the balance the high with the low. 

Dear God of Elijah

You already know what I'm about to say. I'm want to thank you for EVERYTHING! you have been there for me through it all. If I'm noting in this world I know that I'm something in your eyes. You know me! The real me. You knew what I was going to go through when you was creating me. Even though I get older every year and my body changes through every age I'm still a child of God. Sometime I'm ungrateful towards you. Do I mean it? No I'm just young and naive. But I want to thank you for still sticking around and watching over me. I could of been dead a long time ago. But each blessing mornings you give life into me. I honestly be thinking how can I still have a good heart after all that I been through? But than I think about Jesus and his kind heart that he had for everyone even those that did him wrong. I finally understand why I still have a good heart b/c my heart reflect the goodness of Jesus's heart. I've disappointed you too many time but still you show me your mercy. There were time when I even doubted you because I was foolishly walking my sight and not by faith. That's where I went wrong. I don't have the last saying about my life only you do. I have faith in you that you'll make a way for me. 

Crying in my dream....

I had a dream this morning. In it I was crying heavy. I remember the way that I cried was the same way that I cried the last time I dream of Miss appearing in my dream. In my dream I was seeing a guy who got adopted by these kind rich people. At first he took them for granted and didn't appreciated everything that they did for him until later on when he had goting older. He came to his sense and ending up doing good. Which made his people proud of him. Than I saw myself reflecting on all the good people that had help me throughout my life. I was sooo overwhelm that I starred crying like a new born tears were poring from my eyes like waterfall. I don't know exactly what this dream mean but I woke up and pray to God to cancel every bad dreams.

It get tiring...

Sometime I just be exhausted from everything that I encountered. Sometime it's the pain that remind me not to be too naive. I been through hell and back and I don't want to go there again. I'm tire of the same ol same ol. When will I get it together? I need God to protect me from the evil that is surrounding me. 

I want the best for myself

I just want to see myself advance. I don't want to be in the same spot that I was in when 3-4 months from now. I want to live a good life and have good vibes with good people in my life. I don't want to bag for nothing in life but for mercy from God. I've been through a lot and it's time for me to overcome. I can't be siting in one spot for the rest of my life. God has so much things to offer to me. I'm going to discipline myself and raise myself. I am all I got on this earth. 

March 1st 2015

So today I got my first of the month kiss from Chris and at the same time today is the same day that I moved into my very own apartment. The unpacking part was annoying because I have a lot of things. But thank God for ms.Thais for giving me a helping hand. This is a new chapter in my life. For the very first time in my entire life I'll be on my own and having my own space. I've never had a place I can call my own before so this is very new to me. I finally have somewhere I can call home. I don't have to worry about no drama because I have

my own space. 

Our first kiss 💋

So today around 12 on the last day of Februray Chris and I had our first kiss. It was awkward but in a cute way. We were lying down in the living room with the light turn off when he said "come here" I did what he said and he tried to kiss me but couldn't find my lips. Lol i was cracking up because of the fact that he couldn't find my lips. We both laughed at each other and give it another try. This time he managed to find it and planted a kiss on my lips. I remember how his lips felt. I remember him telling me that I don't know how to kiss. I remember the way he kissed my cheek. It felt like wet little fishes sucking on my toe.